tothemoon

The HMS2000 has agreed to share this "alien excerpt" with jgmmusic.com with the condition that it be buried quite deeply in the site! This is getting quite deep!

ACTUAL COPY OF CONTROVERSIAL BOOK FOUND!
The HMS2000 has been able to obtain an intact copy of this rare book. The presses were stopped after only a few hundred copies of this were printed! Hot's views on the immigration laws were simple...you either have or attain a tremendous amount of knowledge about this country....or you don't get to stay here.
Check out this chapter below on the "citizenship test" Probably none of us could pass this stringent exam..and would , hence , be sent "to the moon" . (The humor of Mont's paraphrase of Jackie Gleason's "To the Moon , Alice" was probably lost on the masses).


Chapter 13: THE CITIZENSHIP TEST
-Excerpt from "To The Moon , Aliens" by H.P. Mont

This chapter deals with my urgent concerns over "multi- cultural overload".............
Anyone who knows me or has read any of my other tomes realizes that I am a huge proponent of world cultural intermingling. My current fascination with the wonderful music of Latin America attests to this. My main concern is that the ongoing mass integration of other languages & customs does not come with out a price.
We cannot now or ever afford to become a multi-lingual country. Of course, all races, creeds, religions are welcome here , but a working basic language skill in English is imperative. Why? Read on!
Too many ideas of great importance have been lost through "translational loss of language nuances". The multiple translations of one of our cultures most revered writings is a prime example: The Bible, The Torah, The Koran…call it what you may, a lot of it stems from the same place. So why so many contradicting interpretations? Because of the language differences of course! The "Tower of Babel" story from all of the above sacred manuscripts needs no reiteration here. Our culture is headed for this same demise.

If new ideas , language & customs cannot be adequately assimilated into the mainstream culture, splinter groups will arise to serve the needs of small sub-cultures. The historical precedence of this is redundant enough not even to deserve re-dressing here. Our neighbor to the north, Canada, has always been a nation divided against itself.. In the case of Canada, it's simply because of the vast distances between population centers, and the different European nations which settled areas of it. There is clearly a "French part" and an "English part" & never the twain shall meet. The country will be constantly wracked by secession attempts.

America never has had this "original divide as Canada"; but we are creating an artificial & much more devastating one by not requiring one primary language to be spoken, taught & required at the schools & public offices of all of the states in the nation.
Because of my passion for not restricting new cultural input to America , which is tempered by my concern for language breakdown and the inherent communication problems which will follow, I propose a new citizenship test that all of us already born here will have to pass just the same as migrating aliens would .

This test could be administered painlessly to all students of public education at a certain grade level. The adult population would be required to take the test either when they register to vote, or better yet, when the census is taken…. or even better yet, when they apply or re-apply for a drivers license.
As far as the actual content of the "test", my views on the immigration laws are simple: You either have or attain a tremendous amount of knowledge about this country....or you don't get to stay here & muck up the communication. All races, creeds, religions are welcome, but it's not a free ride. You must have a basic functional (roughly 6th grade level ) grasp of the primary language (which is English, by the way) & you must understand the laws of the nation, on top of the specific laws of the the jurisdiction in which you intend to reside. Also included is some history which is relevant to our cultural norms & enough basic math to "balance a checkbook". All of this must happen before attaining citizenship.

Needless to say, the test will not be "gravy" for those "culturally unqualified". But, anyone who paid attention during grade school and has attained an education equivalent to "Jethro Bodine" should be able to ace this. If you can't pass, you'll get several chances to "bone up". Due to the language barrier, there probably can't be much cheating: If you know the language well enough to cheat, welcome to America! You'll probably be a huge success here. Incoming aliens have consistently (for the last 5 years or so) been shown to have a better grasp of American history during citizenship tests than "home-grown" high school students do!

To summarize, here's my message to all of those people recently arrived or still outside our borders; my dream is to see this paragraph etched on a statue in a prominent place someday:

"To all foreign peoples yearning to come to America: bring us all of your wonderful & unique art, music , knowledge, poetry, prose, science, culinary treats & insight. But please allow all (or almost all) of us to really appreciate & share this treasure by integrating it into our existing culture.. instead of insisting on holding on to the "old country" ways and isolating yourself away in sub-cultures. It's worked great for several hundred years; let's continue this truly "American" tradition".

-Excerpt from "To The Moon , Aliens" by H.P. Mont



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